Patience and restraint firmly ...

The practice shows that many people seek help from qualified therapists, some advice is enough to get rid of different kinds of fear. Psychotherapist Medical-Psychological Center individuality MD Zadirakin Alexey

st. Garden-Karetnaya, 20 / 6, Building 2. 209-98-80, 209-94-20

www.mpci.ru

How to sort things out properly

Patience and restraint firmly entrenched as the basic rules of etiquette. But from the perspective of traditional psychology, public morality teaches man not to solve problems, and their patience. First, it leads to what the problem is not really solved, if only the time do not pass, and secondly, is destroyed by the personality of a person under the influence of the energy accumulated unexpressed negative emotions. In addition, restraint - it is hypocrisy, that is, we feel one thing, say the second, and do the third. In this case, the negative emotions that have built up a critical mass, can lead to uncontrolled explosion. But wait for it, you see, do not want to. What to do? On the one hand, if we kopim their discontent in himself, it is detrimental to himself, if he dumps the aggression on the heads of others, it is detrimental to their self-esteem and mood. The easiest way - to take control of their aggressiveness, conduct themselves in all sincerity and all difficult situations openly say that you actually feel, for example: "This situation drives me crazy," "I must confess that I go into a rage "" That made me terribly angry, "" I is unpleasant, "" I feel pressure, "etc. This is a good start to his guest the opportunity arose to heed the power of your emotions and make a contribution to the real solution. The main thing is that your words should not express an attack on the interlocutor, that is, the phrase should not contain the words "you" or "you", for example: "You made me angry (hurt, enraged)" or "Do not you understand that this infuriates me. " Such an aggressive tone necessarily touches the interlocutor, and then your conversation is at risk to move to a discussion of personalities. In a worst case partner simply hiding and resentment that can occur later in the worst possible moment. In application of this technique has several limitations. There are arrogant people closed. For selfish strangers emotion - not an occasion for personal reflection and action, that is, they do not take a delicate approach to partnering. Perhaps they are focused only on the language of force, that is, if you do not scream, blackmail, intrigue, intimidation, selfish just do not understand what you are afraid to be angry. If you know yourself as a violent person by nature, who is accustomed to bright and saturated to express all their emotions, but do not want to damage the environment, can all be forewarned that sometimes violently angry. But remember that in your environment, perhaps there are people with tremulous warehouse mentality, which in principle not be able to withstand any form of hard to express emotions.