UNDERSTAND CHILDREN Children begin ...

But death is an unavoidable fact of life. Us and our children need to take it. If we want to help them, we must show them that talking about death is possible and permissible. Just talking with our children about death, we have the opportunity to clarify for themselves what they know or do not know if they have any fears, concerns, misconceptions. And then we are able to give them the necessary information to help them understand what is happening and get rid of unnecessary alarms. Of course, the conversations can not solve all problems, but without talking, we can not help each other. Age and experience of our children depends on how and under what circumstances we will be talking to them about death. But it is also linked to our own experiences, beliefs, feelings and the situation in which we find ourselves. If we're talking about death in connection with a newspaper article or television program, it is unlikely much will act on our emotions. In another case, for if the talks are the result of family crises. They will inevitably be emotionally charged. And although this book may not help in any situation, provided it is the general information can be useful and it can be used in a specific situation of each family. UNDERSTAND CHILDREN Children are becoming aware of death long before that, as we understand it. They see dead birds, insects, animals, lying on the road. They can see at least once a day die on TV. They hear about it in fairy tales and play their games. Death is a part of everyday life and children at an affordable level, they are aware of it. If we allow our children to talk to us about death, we will be able to give them the necessary information to prepare them for crisis and help them when they are upset. Showing interest and respect for what they say, we encourage them to appeal to us with questions and doubts. But, recognizing the importance of precisely this attitude, we are going to have to be very sincere and discussing this range of problems with the child, not to say anything that is not consistent with our view. These we can also help your child talk with us. Possible, and to ourselves and our children will be easier to approach the discussion of issues related to death, if we can openly look at some of the problems that lead to difficulties in communication. Obstacles that arise when dealing with children on issues related to the theme of death and direct conversation EVASION Many of us tend not to talk about things that upset us. We tried to hide our feelings and we believe that it is better not to say anything at all. But it was the silence leads to difficulties in communication. Children are very observant. They read on our faces, watching his hands. We express ourselves in the fact that we do what we say and, of course, that does not speak. When we avoid talking about the fact that saddens us, children are often hesitant to touch this topic or to ask questions connected with it. A child can explain to myself the situation, like this: "If Mom and Dad can not talk about it, it must be bad, so I'd rather not talk about it too." As a result of default, we instead protect our children, we can establish the reasons for their greater concern and do not give them the opportunity to tell us how they feel, what they think.